Issues
by Mimiko7
Summary: This is a little something i started whenI was bored. YYH YugiOh! Youko, Kuronue, Marik, and Bakura begin to chase people and mess up houses. And just because we stranded them at Wal-Mart. No flames! Review!
1. Default Chapter

Mimiko: Okay, I wrote this for two reasons. One- I was inspired. Two- I was bored out of my mind and ready to strangle a duck.

Hiei: OO

Mimiko: This is the only Yu-go-oh story I've ever written because I barely watch the show in itself. But enough of that. Let's go find a duck.

Hiei: OO Mimiko owns neither YYH or Yu-gi-oh.

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Mimiko and Ioa looked on with wide eyes as the wall not feet away from them collapsed. Mimiko started to freak out seeing as this was not her house and she would be held accountable for the damage. Then four figures stepped through the wall. Ioa couldn't believe her eyes unlike Mimiko who was pissed beyond explanation not to believe anything. "What the fuck are you doing here?! Look what you did to the wall!!" Mimiko shouted pointing to the ground where the remnants of the wall lay. Mimiko was not surprised at all to find Youko, Kuronue, Marik and Bakura standing right before them. Pissed to find them but not at all surprised.

"We've found you!" Marik shouted triumphantly. "What are you talking about you found us?! We didn't go anywhere!" Ioa said. "Yes, you did! You left us in Wal-Mart and we had no idea where you went!" Youko said pointing at Ioa. "That's because we got sick of Bakura trying to make out with the mannequins!" Mimiko replied. "BOOBIES!!" Bakura shouted. Kuronue smacked his forehead in shame. "See!" "That's no reason to leave us stranded!" Marik countered. "We called for you at Costumer Service!" Ioa said raising her voice. "I know but we couldn't find it! You could have given us a map or something." "How could we have given you a map if we didn't know where you were?" Mimiko said crossing her arms. "Use your imagination!" Kuronue spat. Then, Mimiko lost it. I don't know what she lost but she definitely lost something.

"I'm using it now!!" She shouted as she began to strangle Kuronue. "No Mimiko! He's got a ponytail!" Ioa shouted as she tried to pry Mimiko off of Kuronue's neck. Mimiko finally let go after a good minute and Kuronue was not at all pleased. He began to chase after both Ioa and Mimiko. Bakura quickly joined the chases only because he was being driven by his raging hormones and needed something to do. "Yay! Boobies!" He shouted gleefully. Marik and Youko looked at each other and shrugged. They soon joined in the chase too. Mimiko and Ioa sprinted upstairs to find a good hiding spot. "After them!" Marik shouted. They all ran upstairs to find Mimiko plastered against the wall and Ioa with a lampshade on her head.

"Become one with the wall…. You are invisible…." Mimiko said softly. "She's clearly visible." Youko said. Kuronue walked over to Ioa and pulled her hair. "Click." Ioa said. Kuronue was enjoying quite a bit. He pulled on her hair twice. "Click click." Then Kuronue accidentally pushed her over. "Shatter!" Ioa screamed. Bakura then had Mimiko in a fierce hug. "Boobies! My boobies!" Mimiko then began to freak out and fidget under Bakura's grip. "ONE WITH THE WALL!! ONE WITH THE WALL!!" She hollered. She somehow got out of Bakura's grasp on her and scurried away. Then he advanced on Ioa. Ioa ran but Bakura had her by the legs and tied to himself. "Boobs!" "Quickly Bakura! They went that way!" Ioa said pointing in a random direction. "No! Please don't leave!" Bakura said as he ran away with Ioa dragging painfully behind him. Mimiko then in out of thin air, grabbed Kuronue's hat and ran away again. Marik and Youko stared at her in confusion. "I know, I don't know why I did it either." She said continuing to run. "My hat!" Kuronue shouted. "My virginity!" Marik said reaching his hand out. "Whatever." Youko said rolling his eyes. "Shh! I'm having a moment!" Then Marik whipped out his magical golden rod (Hee hee…) and began to stroke it. (Tee hee hee!) "It's okay…. We'll get her…. Shhh… No! Don't talk!" "Okay." The rod replied. Marik eyes got wide and decided to put his long shiny rod away. (I think it's funny.)

"they'll never find us." Mimiko whispered. Ioa nodded. "Our hiding spot is way too secretive." Then Kuronue shouted, "Hurry I found them! They're sitting right in the middle if the hallway!" "God dammit!" Mimiko said. Ioa smacked her right over the head. "You're an idiot." "You're talking to yourself again." Mimiko said. "Oh." Ioa smacked Mimiko over the head again. "You're an idiot." "Theeeere we go!" Marik grabbed Mimiko as Bakura grabbed Ioa. "Got you!" They both exclaimed. Then Youko grabbed Kuronue. "You got purty eyes." He said with a southern accent. Kuronue looked scared for his life. "Dude. "He said. Youko quickly let go. "Sorry." "………..Dude….." Then Mimiko began to scream. "Ahhh! Ah! He bit me!" Marik replied. "Ha ha! I bit you!" Ioa had easily gotten rid of Bakura by giving him two bouncy balls to chase after, which Bakura enjoyed quite a bit. That is right until he wasn't paying attention to where he was going and somehow got stuck in the dryer.

Kuronue began to, for reasons unknown, hump the stairs. Everyone looked on in horror. (except Bakura because he was too preoccupied with being stuck in the dryer and all….. heh heh heh… o.o! ) Then Kuronue stood up and pointed to the stairs. "I told you I was straight!" "Oh, you SO proved them wrong Kuronue." Youko replied. Kuronue puffed out his chest and smiled triumphantly. Marik looked down to find that Mimiko had run off and Ioa was gone too far. This is where he lost it. Again, I have NO IDEA what these people have but they need to stop losing it. Thank you. Marik then began to smash his head in to the wall. "There's a hole in the wall." Youko said simply. Marik glared at him and began to try to devour his rod. (Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!! ………… -cough- )

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Mimiko: Okie! First chapter done!

Hiei: Review! No flames! Or I shall ingest a goat!

Mimiko: OO


	2. Back to WalMart

Mimiko: Oi! Just a quick note. My OC's and my friend's OC will not be the main topic of the story. I had one story that got deleted because of something like that. Just wanted to clear that up.

Hiei: You probably deserved it.

Mimiko: No I didn't! I'm a sweet, delicate flower! –presses random buttonnearby building blows up-

Hiei: OO

(I own neither YYH or Yugi-Oh )

Youko rubbed his head in frustration as he pondered something. "How hard is it to find TWO demon girls!" He exclaimed as he began to pull his hair. Which somehow immediately grew back. Kuronue was, for reasons unknown, very fascinated by this and decided it would be okay to pull his own hair out to see if it would grow back as Youko's did. Kuronue grabbed a chunk of hair and ripped it out quickly. "Ah! Ow! No! Now I'm going bald!" Kuronue said holding his head in pain. Marik boldly stepped forward. "Let us consult my long, hard, rod!" He said holding up his millennium rod. Suddenly there came a loud laughing noise in the background which faded away in a few seconds and left Marik, most of all very confused. "What's so funny?

Then, Ioa and Mimiko ran as fast as their legs could carry them and made a break for the door. Lucky for them, the door was open. Actually there was no door left, seeing as how the wall where the door used to be was now a pile of rocks. So, they did not break the door, for there was no door, but managed to jump out of the hole in the wall. "WAHA! HUZZAH!" They exclaimed as they both ran into Wal-Mart. "Noooo!" Kuronue whined. Youko's eyes widened as he watched the girls run into the store from hell. "You did that on purpose!" Youko said pointing at the two figures. Then, somehow, Bakura got out of the dryer and stood beside the hole in the wall. "NO BOOBIES! WAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! Ooooooo…. Ha ha!" Bakura was truly saddened his hormones were not being pleased but did find great joy to find his bouncy balls again.

Marik barely noticed the absence for he was still pondering what had been so funny. He concentrated so hard that his face began to get red as a cherry. Then, without warning the unthinkable happened. Marik… had farted. Marik realized his mistake too late and began to blush. Youko covered his nose quickly. "Disgusting! I can't breathe!" Marik looked around. "No! It was him!" Marik said pointing to a small chipmunk sitting on the staircase. "Cheep?" "Shame on you for passing wind!" Marik said trying to cover up his own mistake. The chipmunk hung his head in shame and then exploded the next second. "AH! HOLY SHIT!" The men exclaimed as they backed away from the mass of chipmunk guts that had been launched onto the wall.

They all left the house and carefully, walked over to Wal-Mart. Bakura went up to the wall of Wal-Mart and poked it with his foot. Youko rolled his eyes. "It's not going to bite you or anything." Then the wall began to growl. "Ah!" Bakura said as he ran behind Marik. "Marik…. It's staring at me." Marik reached into his pocket and pulled out a cracker and threw it over to the wall, hoping it would be pleased. Then, JcPenny's and Target started to fight over the cracker like vicious animals. Afraid for their lives, the four demons walked into Wal-Mart. When they walked into Wal-Mart they heard a, "Ding!" "Ah!" They all said. "Look!" Youko whispered pointing to the camera. "They're watching us!" Kuronue hugged himself. "I feel so violated." Marik picked up Bakura by the feet and prodded the camera with him. "Jeez, Bakura, you're heavy." "Oh! So now I'm fat!" Bakura said folding his arms. Marik dropped Bakura. "In a way." He replied. "WAAAAH!" Bakura began. "I'm going to stuff myself with Fig Newtons and Chips Ahoy cookies so I can fill the empty void inside of me! WAAAAAAHHHHH!" Bakura then ran off the snack aisle of the store. The three demons just stood there and shrugged their shoulders and proceeded without him.

Kuronue wandered off to the products aisle and looked at the perfume. "Sugar cane and candy apple." He read off of a perfume label. "Oh nummy!" Kuronue picked up the Perfume and sprayed in his mouth. "Ah! He said. "Ah! He said again as he rolled around on the ground. Kuronue then threw the perfume across the aisle. "You instrument of Satan!" He hollered. Marik steped forward. "My rod will help!" Then everyone in the store paused and proceeded to laugh at Marik. Then went on about their lives. Marik plopped down onto the floor. "I still don't get it!" He said beginning to pout. Kuronue slammed his hand on the floor. "YOU'RE WORKING FOR THEM! AREN'T YOU!" He shouted trying his best interrogate some deodorant. Then he scurried over to Youko. "It's a conspiracy…." He whispered.

Mimiko and Ioa could be seen the demons now. They were running around the store making up their own theme song. "DUN NA NAAA! BUM! BUM BA DUN! NUN….. NAAAA! They sang. Suddenly a girl fell from the sky. "AAAAAHHHHH!" Kuronue tried to catch her, but aborted the mission at the last second because he had a spilt end. The girl fell flat on her face on the floor. "Ow…." "That was new." Youko said right before a donkey fell from the sky as well. Marik did not notice anything for he was still pondering what was so gosh darn funny. Then the girl spoke, "I am the enchantress known as TIM! Wait no that's t not right! Mihana! Yeah, that's it!" "How about Rob?" Kuronue suggested. "No! I got my name changed last week!" She jumping on Youko's head. "You don't know me! I'm not like that! Damn those chickens of the underworld." She said running off, flailing her arms as if something was after her. The demons just stared blankly as the girl ran off.

Then Marik gasped. "You thought I was talking about my penis!" He said loudly. "MY penis! Why were you thinking about that! You sick, sick perverts!" He hollered pointing to Mimiko and Ioa. Mimiko and Ioa stared at Marik then simply walked away. Bakura could then be seen walking towards everyone stuffing himself full of Lucky Charms. "WHY CAN'T YOU SEE ME FOR WHO I AM!" He said grabbing a nearby victim. The victim screamed and ran away. "Even total strangers hate me!" Bakura said plopping down on the floor. A small child came up behind Bakura and gave him a hug. "I wuv you!" "Really?" Bakura asked turning around. The child saw that Bakura had bloodshot eyes and meesed up hair and screamed. "It's GODZIIIIWAAAAAAAAA!" Then everyone in the store began breaking things for no apparent reason. The demons quickly ran into the employee's bathroom and locked the door. Marik pointed at the wall. "Okay from now on! When I say 'rod' I don't mean my penis!" Youko began to bang his head against the wall while Bakura cried and Kuronue began yelling at the toilet paper for dissing his mama.

Mimiko: Okay! Chapter 2 is done!

Marik: I hate you.

Mimiko: Really?

Marik: Review. No flames……….. Pervert.

Mimiko: Tee hee.


	3. Hail Bakura!

Mimiko: I do not own YYH/ YGO. –snaps fingers- Where we last off, Bakura, Marik, Youko and Kuronue were in the bathroom at Wal-Mart to escape the chaos, which probably did not help them what so ever.

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Youko rubbed his head in an attempt to get rid of the headache he'd had for quite sometime. "Would you cut it out!" He yelled at Kuronue. Kuronue had been playfully chewing on the toilet paper he'd found in a random bathroom stall. Well, not playfully, but he was chewing on it while shaking his head rapidly. Kuronue smiled innocently up at Youko and ran into a stall. Out of the four, Youko was probably the most in touch with reality. But, that did not excuse him from going into small lapses of insanity. Marik just stared at Youko as he turned around and started yelling at the wall for "dissing his mama." Bakura walked up to Marik and pulled on his sleeve. "Marik…" He said pointing at the mirror. "There is a devilishly handsome man in the mirror mimicking me." He whispered. "That's your reflection you idiot!" Marik spat. "It has a name!" Bakura gasped. He walked over to the mirror and glared at it. "So, Your Reflection, you think you're so hot! Well I'm hotter!" Bakura yelled shaking his fist and doing a variety of poses.

"You're so immature." Marik said to himself, braiding his hair. "WHAT! My mother is not fat! She's skinnier than me!" Youko screaming as he tried to bite the wall. "Hold it guys! We've got to snap back to reality. We're losing our minds." Marik said putting his hands up. "We are! Oh my god where'd they GO!" Bakura screamed looking around frantically. "It's a figure speech of stupid! My Lord you're slow!" (Now, that's just mean.) Kuronue shouted. "You don't have to point out what we already know! MEANIE BUTT!" Bakura yelled back. "Oh, that was nice." Youko said sarcastically. "I hate you all!" Bakura cried as he ran out of the bathroom.

Time passed and they all now have mustaches and beards. "Man, how long has it been since we've been here?" Marik asked. Youko pulled out a watch he stole from Mimiko and Ioa's house. (Hey!) He studied it for about a minute or two. "Well?" Marik asked. "Half an hour." Youko replied. "Oh." "Can we take these off? Mine is itchy." Kuronue whined as he scratched his beard. "Fine! But it won't be as authentic!" Marik said crossing his arms. Youko and Kuronue took their beards off quickly. "Finally!" Kuronue said rubbing his cheek.

"Aren't you going to take yours off?" Youko asked Marik. "Hm? What do you mean?" He replied. "Aren't you going to take your beard off?" Youko answered. "I can't." "What?" Kuronue pulled on Marik's beard, but it wouldn't come off. "Omigod! It's real!" Youko and Kuronue scooted away. "Ew." "Okay, so I can grow an extremely long beard in less than an hour, we can still be friends right?" Marik asked. Just then a bird poked its head out of Marik's beard. "Goddammit! If you can't pay the rent then get the hell out!" Marik said pointing at the door. The bird hung its head and flew out of Marik's beard. "Goddamn hobo…." Youko and Kuronue stared at Marik and ran out the door.

Actually, they ran right through the door to be exact and skidded to a stop in front of a mob of people who seemed to be carrying something. "All hail the mighty Bakura!" They chanted. "What?" Youko and Kuronue said together. Bakura emerged with a plastic tiara on his head and a bed sheet tied to his neck. "All hail me!" He shouted. "What the hell are you doing!" Youko asked. Kuronue wasn't listening, he was too busy staring at the fake tiara on Bakura's head. "Ooooh… plastic is shiny!" He said jumping up and down. "I'm hailing me! It's much fun! And if you don't like it you can suck a mango!" "Oh no! You're too late!" Kuronue squealed loudly holding a mango in his hands.

"We were in there for 30 MINUTES! YOU WERE THERE FOR TEN OF THOSE MINUTES! And now you're Queen of Wal-Mart!" Youko screamed pulling his hair out. "Hey! You said 'Queen'!" Bakura pointed out. "He's saying you don't have a penis!" Kuronue whispered very loudly. "Hey! I have penis!" Bakura shouted in a high-pitched voice. "I never said you didn't! Kuronue's putting words into my mouth!" Youko shouted back. Kuronue sighed. "I'm a whore for a tiara." "No, you're just a whore!" Youko yelled. "So are you!" Kuronue replied. They both put their hands on each others necks and tried to strangle each other.

"Where's my accountant! ACCOUNTANT!" Bakura shouted. Marik stomped out of the bathroom. "What now!" He bellowed. Bakura paused before speaking. "Well hello Gandalf." "Shut up!" Marik hollered in frustration. With a flash of light his beard disappeared. "It's that simple huh?" "Yep." "Hang on a second." Youko said removing his hands from Kuronue's throat. "You're Wal-Mart's accountant?" "No…" Marik replied. "I'm his accountant." He said pointing to Bakura. "How much do I have left in my savings?" Bakura asked jumping on top of the large mob. Marik pulled out a calculator and stabbed at the keys with his fingers. "Twenty-seven cents and a lollipop." "Oh goody!" Bakura said clapping his hands. "I can buy a stick of gum?" "ENOUGH!" Youko shouted. "We came here to extract revenge on those girls for sending us here…. Twice. We need to find them!" Just then, Youko heard Kuronue fumbling with something behind him. "Whoa ho ho… I dunno about any girls but look at what I found!" Kuronue beamed and held up various pairs of lingerie.

Bakura's hands flew up to face and he gasped. "Boobies!" He lunged at a nearby mannequin and caressed it fondly. "Did you miss me? I missed me." Marik smacked his forehead and shook his head in shame. "What are we going to do with him?" "I know really. I'M supposed to be the man-whore around here. What's the deal?" Youko said motioning towards Bakura. Marik shrugged and joined Kuronue in the lingerie section. "Whoa!" Kuronue exclaimed holding up a large bra. "This is HUGE! I'm gonna wear it as hat!" Kuronue said tying it on his head. "Kuronue put that away!" Youko said smacking it off him. Kuronue whimpered and crawled underneath a nearby shopping cart. "We've got to find those girls so we can get out of here." Youko said quietly. Bakura pranced around his mannequin while throwing confetti all over the plastic statue. "I'm gonna make you pretty!" Bakura reached into his pocket and pulled out a picture of himself. He placed it on the mannequins face and taped it securely. "Ah! Honey! Whatever you're doing it's working!"

Marik dragged Bakura away from the life-size doll and held on tightly to his cape. "No fooling around! I want to get out of here!" Just then, the loudspeakers came on. "Attention Wal-Mart shoppers- Tampons and ovaries…. That is all." Bakura gasped and tugged on Marik's sleeve. "Can we get some ovaries please Marik? I've always wanted some!" Everyone looked at Bakura with perverse horror. "NO! NO! Absolutely not!" Marik said yanking his sleeve from Bakura's grasp. "Please Marik! I promise I'll use them everyday!" "Do you even know what ovaries are!" Youko asked leaning down dangerously close to Bakura's face. "Nope! No idea! But I want some!" Youko sighed and scratched his head. "Fine we'll get you some ovaries." Bakura's eyes lit up. "Really! Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Youko looked around and tossed something Bakura. "Here. Ovaries." Bakura looked at the small package in his hand. "Wooooow…. But why does it say 'Kit Kat' on the wrapper?" Bakura asked. Youko started walking away. "I dunno! The guy who was supposed to make the wrappers got high and wrote the wrong name! He was drunk and not thinking clearly! His kids were driving him crazy and he was stressed out! Or he was sick and tired of looking for two stupid, violent girls who trapped him in Wal-Mart!" Youko bellowed. "Hey!" Everyone turned around to see Mimiko and Ioa standing behind the large mob. "We are not violent!" Mimiko shouted as both she and Ioa pushed random people onto the floor.

"After them!" Bakura shouted. The mob turned around with angry looks on their faces. "Grrr!" "Erm…. They went that way?" Ioa said pointing to her right. The mob nodded and quickly ran off to the right section of the store. "That won't work with us." Marik said coolly crossing his arms. "Yeah… we went that way." Mimiko replied pointing to the floor. "Ah ha!" Bakura jumped and landed on the spot where Mimiko specified and began to claw at the tiling. "Oh my God he's stupid." Youko said rubbing his temple. "Away!" The two girls shouted. Both grabbed pogo sticks and hopped off. Or at least Mimiko did. Ioa seemed to be having trouble with hers. "Mimikoooo…." She whined. "Mine's not working!" Ioa stared at the toy for a moment and then tossed it to the side. "Take that!" Suddenly, the pogo stick hopped up and went after Ioa, who squeaked quite loudly and ran away.

They went down the aisle were the Fig Newtons are! After them!" Youko shouted. "THEY DID! FIG NEWTONS! I'M THERE!" Bakura said as he jetted off towards the hunting department. Everyone then just stood there for a minute until Youko realized something. "Oh shit! They keep guns in the hunting department don't they!" Youko screamed.

End of Chappy 3.


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